Blog Archives

My First book for sale on Amazon.


Well, I want to first wish everyone a wonderful Holiday season. To each of you as well, a truly wonderful New Year!!!

 

I finished on Christmas Eve my first book. It is not the longest, but rather meant to be read in a single sitting.

 

I wanted to write a Christmas story this year for everyone. A story that was more updated than many of the others available out there.

A 21st Century Christmas Tale, is what came out.

It is the story of Thomas, a truly gifted business employee, and a truly egotistical person as well. He is driven by his business, and money, not caring about anyone around him, to include his family.

But when a tragic accident takes the life of his parents and sister, he is left with the one thing he hates the most in this world. A 14 month old child.

Can Thomas embrace the challenges of life with a child? Or will he turn her over to the State to be raised in a children’s home, because she interferes with his career, and life?

This is not a journey of self discovery, this is a journey of family discovery.

It will be made available on Amazon.com in the next week or two, for some unset low price.

I hope you will come and read.

When it is available, I will post more details here.

Peace.

Lance

Advertisements

Moving Anxiety.


Well, My family and I need to move out of our apartment after the new year. We weren’t kicked out, rather the company that owns our apartment flats has decided to finally renovate them after 40 years.

We are happy and scared at the same time. We are a family of 4, and the apartment we found through the company, that has recently been renovated, and meets our needs, only has 2 bedrooms… The square footage is slightly more than the one we currently occupy.

We are taking it though, with the hopes that sometime in the future, one of the boys will move out, freeing up one of the bedrooms. But we can only hope. For the mean time though, our new family room is in the shape of an “L” and we will turn the portion of the family room that is the bottom portion of the “L” into a temporary bed room.

My wife and I are not entirely too worried about it though. We agree that this is our second from last rental properties. The next place we move to, will be a small house, and we will finish our lives there.

There are some setbacks though.

although we are moving to an apartment owned by the same company that owns our current house, we still need to pay a deposit on the new one. We don’t need to pay the entire deposit, but rather half. This is still a staggering €700.00 or $900.00.

This is a staggering amount for us, yet there is still more problems we are facing as well.

I have never understood this, maybe it is the fact that I am used to how life in the Army was, or in the United States is. But in Germany any apartment does not come with anything installed. No kitchen, and by this I mean the only thing in a kitchen here is the hookups for the water, and the oven. No counters, no shelves, and no cabinets. Nothing.

Same can be said about any of the rooms in the place. There are almost no built-in closets anywhere in Germany. There are no cabinets in the bathrooms.

We will be bringing the furniture we have with us in our apartment. However our kitchen is approximately 40 years old. So I will need to re-work it to fit into the new kitchen, and also replace the counter top portion of it. This is not too expensive, however when we weigh the costs we need to already lay down for the deposit, we are pushing €1,000.00 or around $1,300.00.

This to me is an outstanding number, just to move apartments, at the request of the company who wants to renovate their own building.

I find it amazing that they do not assist us, or offer us anything more than the cost of the truck we need to move, and they are basically only paying the cost for the deposit of it for the 2 days we will need. So again, look here. another cost added to the overall expenditures already building up.

I am not complaining. No. Rather I am excited to finally get out of the area where the teenage hooligans are slowly, unchecked by the police, taking over the area. In the past 2 years, they have constantly been spray painting the area with their horrible version of graffiti. Which is nothing more than spraying their “gang” logo, “Bergl 11” on every vertical surface they can find. I have even seen places where they have sprayed trees in the park behind our house. These Children hang out in an area in the park that is also a children’s play area. there are monkey bars, and a climbing ring there for them.

Every morning when I walk our dog through the park, I am only able to take him in a single direction, as there are smashed vodka and beer bottles on the ground. Trash litters every single inch of the grass, and the children’s play area where they occupy for the evening. I try to avoid it as much as possible, as there are constantly children meandering through the park in the mornings, on their way to the school located only a hundred feet away. It is an embarrassment that the children need to see this every morning on the way to the school, which by the way has also been spray painted with certain slogans popular with the “gang”. Ranging from “F**k the police”, “Bergl 11”, And various other colourful phrases.

I have seen the police often times called into the park to rouse a fight between them, or to see if there are any illegal drugs being used. But I never see them haul any of them away with them. This I find amazing.

They drink, smoke pot, and scream and yell all evening, by all evening I mean until at least 1 AM. I have often times even seen reminants of a bicycle they set on fire with lighter fluid the night before. There are also various other things they have burned, which I am surprised when they do, no one has called the fire department. They steal anything that is not locked up. There have been children’s tricycles from one of our neighbour children spotted in shambles in the park the next morning, when the 6 year old didn’t bring it back into the house when he went back inside. Scooters from his older brother often lie in pieces on the walkway in front of the apartments the next morning, as the “Gang” smashed it on the pavement as they walked by.(He has bought 3 to date)

When it rains, there is a tunnel through the apartment complex where we live, right below our bedroom window, and one of my son’s windows, and they then take up residence there for the course of the evening. They tear the plaster off of the wall, spray paint them, and light things on fire. Constantly yelling and screaming at each other. We have called the police no less than three times in the last year alone. There are over forty families living in this apartment building. So it makes me wonder how many other times they have been called to no avail?

With the state doing nothing about these children thinking they are so big, by the way, most of them are about 16-18 years old, There will be no change. No matter how many times my family calls the police, and other families call the police, there is no change. With no change will come the slow methodical transformation of the area from what at one point was a higher standard of living area. Now it is almost a ghetto. Sadly enough.

So the thought of moving excites me.

But I will need to work twice as hard to afford it, but I don’t mind, as it gets me away from “Bergl 11”.

 

Peace my friends.

Lance

State of the human condition


Imagine if you would, if you still have not seen the Youtube video, with me:

The setting is a small street in China, and the security cameras spot a two year old child wandering in the street in front of his parents shop. Within short time, an approximately 7 ton delivery truck turns onto the narrow, seemingly seldom used street. Within seconds, the driver hits, and then runs over the child, stopping once the front left tire has completely rolled over his mid section.

The driver, seemingly in a daze, unsure what he has hit, then decides to flea the scene. The back tires of the truck then run over the child’s legs.

Within short time, pedestrians start passing the barely moving child on the street, looking at him, but passing by.

Again, another delivery truck enters the street, and again, runs over the child’s legs again. This time it was obvious that the driver recognized what was lying in the street, but opted to attempt to drive by the small helpless figure on the street.

Until finally a woman came, and propped the body on the side of the street, and contacted authorities, and the parents in their shop.

This event was captured on Closed Captioned Television (CCTV) in china recently. It came to our attention in my home, from my son, who watched the video, which was sent to him from a friend fuming about how the people reacted to what had happened.

The event lasted over 8 minutes on video, with more than 16 people walking by the child, who was lying almost in the middle of the street. Every one of them looking at the motionless figure on the ground. They continued on their lives, with the knowledge they did nothing. They were satisfied with that action.

First, have we as humans lost any empathy for others? Has the ability to act out for the benefit of others completely begun to elude us?

What about the parents? How does a two year old get out of the store, and wander on the street, even if it was in front of their shop?

I look at the mayhem that is plaguing the world at the moment, and wonder what the hell is happening. Sometimes I believe that the colonization of other planets is not coming soon enough. I for one would love the chance to just start over anew…

This is something that has been dwelling up in the human race for quite a while now. I first noticed it all the way back when the two teenagers entered the Columbine school in Colorado, and opened fire upon their own classmates and teachers.

As many of you may remember, back then the parents of the boys were up in arms about the fact that it was a video game that caused them to commit this atrocious act. They said that the game desensitized them to the point that human life no longer had a value. Counter Strike was the game in question.

If any of you are gamers, as I am, you may remember Counter Strike being nothing more than a team based terrorist hunt style game. Today we have one just like it called Rainbow Six Vegas 2. The goal of it is to hunt down terrorists in certain locations, gaining points for each kill, in order to advance in ranks.

I however in retrospect, do not believe video games are ever to blame for violence that is being perpetrated in the world at any given point. I have yet to see children jump on a turtle, because they saw Mario do it once. God forbid if one of the Halo gamers ever decided to “Stick” someone!!!  I have not seen someone go absolutely insane yet with a shotgun, claiming that House of The Dead caused them to see zombies everywhere… You get my point.

What most failed to see in the columbine, and subsequent attacks around the globe, is that in all cases both parents worked, and the children were home alone until their return. Drugs, access to weapons, social shunning, and bad morale upbringing were primary causes for them. There is also one major point I want to hi-light, The fact both parents were confident in their upbringing of the children.

As a psychology student, I thought about this after it happened.

It was amazing to me how none of the parents took responsibility, but rather used the  scapegoat of the video game culture to place the  blame on. They did not believe, and most likely still do not believe that they were in any part responsible for the atrocities their children perpetrated. Never could it be the fact that the parents were not there allot of the time to help instil correct behavioural processes into their children. Proper teachings that children need to learn from their parents.

We as humans learn the beginning of our lives from our parents. We observe, absorb, and apply teachings from our parents into our lives. It is how, as a person becomes older, they suddenly have that “Man I am exactly like my(Mother/Father)” moment.

Now we stand on a new precipice, with a new style of non-human behavioural malfunction.

This child’s life could have been saved, right at the beginning.

The driver of the first truck, may have been distracted, trying to look for the address where the delivery was supposed to go, and not seen the child. But when he made the concious decision to resume driving, after looking what it was he hit, is where the failure on his part will forever haunt him. Justly is the case, I hope personally, that he torments in a personal hell that will last the rest of his life. I do not hate the man however. But I empathise for him.

Why?

Well we live in a society at the moment where we criticise people for late deliveries, more than taking the life of a small child. Walk by the lifeless form of a small child on the street because we are afraid of interfering in the matter, fearing becoming entangled in the bureaucratic red tape, and paperwork, and questioning involved with its discovery.

We have seemingly started a downward spiral in our empathising of others, worried more about the personal gains, rewards, punishments, and justifications of interfering with the fate of others.

We are also seemingly more and more absent in the rearing of our children, once they reach a certain age, and feel they can now fend for themselves. They are missing the parental taught morale upbringing needed to learn how to interact with peers, and humans alike.

We need to reach out to our neighbours and brethren living on the planet, no matter how many of us there are.

We need to stop wars, and come to peaceable conclusions to our indifferences.

Take the time out to help someone obviously in trouble.

I understand the perfect way of life imagined by Gene Rodenberry in Star Trek, where there is no longer any form of currency, in order to remove poverty, and to bring all to an equal status of living is impossible.

But with harmony, and love toward what we are, individually thinking self reliant creatures, capable of feeling, free thought, and emotion, maybe we can progress as a human race, and scientifically to develop technology to help us move out into the galaxy.

Then maybe I can get my wish… Starting over new in a colonization in space… on a planet Far, Far away…

My thoughts.

Lance

Welcome to mordfilm’s blog spot.


Welcome all to the new mordfilm Blog.

I know what you are thinking. “Oh man. Not another blog! Don’t we have too many already?”

But listen, this blog is to showcase my short stories I have written over the course of the fifteen years I was in the U.S. ARMY.

Almost all of these stories, which I will present weekly, have never been read by others. Some have been read by friends, and fellow soldiers who were interrested in what I was writing all the time. But never before have I made them available for the entire world to read.

So if you are reading this, I again welcome you to my world.

If you are a fan of horror stories, you have reached the right place.

Most of the stories have adult language, and graphic descriptions in them, so I beg you to use discretion when reading.

I will eventually make folders for the family oriented stories, and the horror stories.

This week I am starting off with my favorite story. “Deaths Hand”

Enjoy.

Lance M. Goolsby