I remember when I was young, around the time I was 13 or 14, I made a proclamation that I would never make it to 30. I was convinced that I would burn out my flame well before then, as I was sure I was going to have an adventurous life.
Well I did, and life had other plans for me.
I joined the U.S. Army a couple months out of high-school, after a job interview in Cherry Hill, New Jersey fell through, and I had a pretty terrible car accident. Now I was not 100% innocent of the accident, as I had just blown my nose and was looking for a place to put the tissue in my sister’s car. Now I was in the center lane of a 3 lane highway, so how was I to foresee that there would be a Philadelphia Inquirer truck parked in the center lane delivering to a gas station? Needless to say, a seat belt saved my life, and the Mitsubishi engine was designed to crumple away from the driver… Again saving my life.
So there I was, a freshly out of high-school soldier. Where did they send me? Germany, where drinking is legal at 18. The town I was stationed in was in the middle of nowhere. I had only a small pay check each month, and could buy beer and alcohol at 18, what it was I did at this point does not need a doctorate in psychology to figure out.
I pretty much spent every night I was there drunk, at least when I can. We did have training maneuvers, and live firing exercises that would often take us from our base and bring us to another for up to a month at a time. While on these drinking was highly forbidden. Me and a couple guys did occasionally find a way to drink a beer or two without detection, but never enough to possibly endanger the rest of the team.
My next duty station, where I actually began to grow as a human was Fort Bragg, in North Carolina. This was in 1992. Here in the land of the 82nd Airborne, soldiers are honed into killing machines. There is almost no place for the weak of will, motivation is a highly treasured friend and strength of character is built. Here I met probably the most influential friend in my life. Through him, I found how education and personal growth is more important than any party. I am not saying that I didn’t party, rather I just didn’t party every day.
In 1993 My unit deployed to the Sinai peninsula in Egypt. The town where we were is called Sharm El Sheikh, it is the furthest south you can go on the peninsula. It was here that Jeff and I both had a total blast with some of our other friends, Joe Gower was the greatest of them. We had our barracks, a dog named Gumba, and a barbecue pit, all with what I could describe and be honest with as the greatest in the world.
We were part of a force dedicated to ensure the peace treaties between Egypt and Israel was fulfilled. It was here that I enrolled in my first college course, Criminal Psychology, through the University of Texas. I did not realize at first, however the short time I attended the class, I had begun something that would change me as a human.
I started to understand there were other things to do with ones life, rather than look for parties, and drink all of the time. I started to learn that self education and the furthering of ones knowledge in whatever it is you like is more important. One of the things I liked to do was write. However for the most part I kept it to myself. Jeff’s mother was an English teacher, so he would often correct grammatical errors I was showing in writing. I learned that English is actually fun to write, and placing word to paper I was better spoken than I ever was orally. Soon after leaving Fort Bragg, en-route back to Germany, I started to explore story writing and journal writing.
However, back to Egypt, I found out many many truths about myself. It was often times when Jeff, Joe and I would make trips to a small hamlet town (Now a major tourist town) named Dahab. It was here that I truly understood how destructive I was toward myself. I would often find myself the brunt of many jokes of all my friends and people we were meeting who were back packing through the town. We often times would sit on the beach with many people we would meet, and spend days talking, swimming and partying. I would often be left out of many of the activities, as I was trying to find any way to garner attention from people, including belittling myself to be the laughing stock. This measure from me never gained me many friends. I know the friends I did have understood, and liked me for whom I was, not who I was projecting myself as.
I found myself in a moment in Egypt looking inwardly trying to actually discover who I was. The classes in psychology helped me actually understand myself. I realized, with my two friends help, that I was not an average person. I now knew that I was able to excel on my own, and that I did not need to look for others for acceptance. With time that would come, and if someone could not accept me for whom I actually was, I would not adjust to them. They like it or they don’t. It became that simple to me.
I did however get into the occasional trouble there though. I was an infantry mortar man. We tend to team up with the scouts of our unit more often than not, and Egypt was no exception. (Mortars are like a small artillery piece that was able to be carried around, providing almost instantaneous support when needed. Scouts are also infantry soldiers, who often try to go forward of the front line to call for our mortar fire, and also provide enemy intelligence to the unit.) The scout platoon, for one reason or another never liked me. On one occasion Jeff, Joe and I were having a party with a few other people in our barbecue pit at out barracks. It became a crazy night, but we had a blast, and I for the most part, am a person who becomes way to talkative when drunk.
The next morning I was summoned to the commanders office. Jeff and I had no idea what it could have been for. Standing in front of the commander, he looked me over really quick, and asked me why I had attempted to light a guard tower on fire the night before. I stared at him, and tried to make sense of what it was he was asking me. I could not swallow the accusation. I may not be the most intelligent person, but I do know, and I am sure 100% of the other people on the planet also know, metal does not burn. The accusations were unfounded. I called forward 2 witnesses, Jeff and Joe and they corroborated my story. We were talking with the guard on duty, but there was no way I was piling wood under the tower, attempting to set it ablaze. If I wanted to light a fire under it, there would have been no try, there would have been a done!
Eventually I also decided to soldier up, and become more than I was, a mediocre soldier. I decided to attempt to be better in my job. Follow orders more closely, and study the army way. There is a test of basic soldiering for the infantry soldiers. It is a difficult task, involving everything from 12 mile forced foot marches, carrying over 50 pounds of equipment, first aide events, weapons proficiency and many more tasks. It is called the Expert Infantry Badge. It is an elite badge of honor for infantry that places them slightly above other infantry soldiers.
For the first time I took this test studying all tasks with a renewed fervour, determined to make it and pass all of the tasks. I accomplished my mission. In the testing phase you are only allowed to fail three tasks, I made it only failing 1.
One of the most proud moments of my life, I wore the badge with pride for the remainder of the time I was a soldier.
Egypt was an enigma for me. It showed me who I truly was, and I began to aspire to become a better person from that point on. I think of my time within the sand and sun as being a place that turned my life around. It helped me learn to strive to become a better person. To not try to please others, to please myself. It taught me not become what other people wanted of me. If I couldn’t not accept myself for who I was, then I strove to become the person I wanted to be. But only for myself.
I thank Joe Gower, and Jeff Holloway for giving me at that moment what I really needed, Understanding and friendship. Because of them, and Egypt, I finally understood who I was. It was at this point I decided that I would allow my flame to burn as long as it could. I wanted to learn everything I could, and maybe share it with someone else out there who is a confused young adult as I was, maybe showing them how to finally understand who they were to become as well.
Lance M. Goolsby
I recently came across some exciting and somewhat troublesome news. There is a Hollywood Blockbuster version of Doctor Who in the works.
I have a couple reservations about the entire thing…
First I must say there is not a better director slotted to working the project.
David Yates, who has directed several of the Harry potter films, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Parts 1 and 2) as well as Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix and Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. His take on a drama, and comedy is unquestionably what helped make the last Potter films a major success. (Who has ever read those crazy books anyway? LOL) He has an ability to truly direct drama with neural surgeon precision.
However he has stated a few things that will drive some of us “Whovians” (A Whovian is a fan of the Doctor Who series, in the same lines as a Trekkie is a Star Trek fan or a Fanboy is a Star Wars fan) a little over the edge.
My first problem is that David said he is currently looking for a writer of the film, which he is expecting to be worked on for the next 2 years, as he wants to ensure that the script for the film is as deep and entertaining in subject as any of the seasons of the Doctor Who Series has ever been.
The doctor has been in one form or another on the television for 47 years, making it the longest running, most successful show in history!!!
For those who still don’t know who the doctor is, here is a little background. Be prepared to be amazed by 47 years, crammed into 6.5 minutes!!!
Ok, I know that was a brief history, but here are the important bits.
- The Doctor (As he is just called) is an alien, in human form.
- He is able to control the ship called the TADRIS, which is able to access any point in space, time, and Dimension.
- The Doctor uses his powers to correct points in time, space, or history which are going off course. To make time run smoothly.
- This is why he is referred to as a “Time Lord”
- It is believed that all other Time Lords are dead.
- The Doctor Protects humans, as he feels closest to them.
- The Doctor is over 500 Years old.
- If the body form he takes gets destroyed, he “Regenerates” in a new form, and in the process brain cells are also newly formed, which is why he has multiple personalities. (This is to help explain the differences in the actors interpretation of the Doctor.)
This is it in a nut shell.
So you ask what my reservations toward a large screen take on it are… Well to me they are simple, and I believe any Whovian out there should also have the same reservations toward the news that has been released so far.
1: OK, the choice for the writer scares me the most. David stated in a press release the following in Variety magazine:
“We want a British sensibility, but having said that, Steve Kloves wrote the Potter films and captured that British sensibility perfectly, so we are looking at American writers too.”
Ok, so Steve wrote the Potter films, great, he did not need to create something from nothing, he simply needed to read a book, and figure out what to put into the film, and what could be left on the pages… Now I am not saying his job was easy, in the slightest, rather his sensibility he captured in the Potter film scripts was simply translating the books sensibility onto the screen. The rest of that came from the director, all of which have been British. So who better knows British sensibility than a Brit?
2: If the American film studios have their grubby mitts into a typically British show, they will be so concentrating on creating something to introduce the American market to the Doctor Who franchise, they are going to insist to David, and Steve that there will HAVE to be a back story to the Doctor. If there is a back story, there will be too much lost to the Doctor.
One of the great things about the Doctor is that there is still allot of unknowns about him. If the Americans get their hands on it, and place in a back story to him, much of who the Doctor is(Or we don’t know who he is), will be lost, FOREVER.
3: They don’t plan on it being tied into the television series at all. Whomever is currently playing the Doctor at the time of the filming, will not be portraying the Doctor in the film. This to me makes absolutely no sense.
- Why make a Doctor Who film, and not include who ever is the Doctor on television?
- Why make a stand alone Doctor film?
- Why not tie the show into the film?
- Why do we need to see another Doctor Who story, with a new Doctor on the big screen?
These are my problems with the news about the Doctor Who film being made, or in the works to be made.
As you can see, I believe that the thought of having a Doctor Who film, unrelated to the television series, and featuring a brand new Doctor, while one is playing him on television seems redundant.
My thoughts are that it may be BBC attempting to remove the Doctor from the small screen, and place him on the big one. I would rather keep running the show on the small screen for another 47 years, with continued stories, even if they are horrible. There have been allot of bad ones, yes, but the number of the absolutely amazing stories greatly outweighs them.
If it were up to me, BBC keep the show only on the small screen, and make a couple movie events for the series, and not a stand alone for Movie theatres.
I believe if this Movie gets made in the way David Yates is wanting to do it, It will signal the end of Doctor Who on television.
Lance M. Goolsby
Well, My family and I need to move out of our apartment after the new year. We weren’t kicked out, rather the company that owns our apartment flats has decided to finally renovate them after 40 years.
We are happy and scared at the same time. We are a family of 4, and the apartment we found through the company, that has recently been renovated, and meets our needs, only has 2 bedrooms… The square footage is slightly more than the one we currently occupy.
We are taking it though, with the hopes that sometime in the future, one of the boys will move out, freeing up one of the bedrooms. But we can only hope. For the mean time though, our new family room is in the shape of an “L” and we will turn the portion of the family room that is the bottom portion of the “L” into a temporary bed room.
My wife and I are not entirely too worried about it though. We agree that this is our second from last rental properties. The next place we move to, will be a small house, and we will finish our lives there.
There are some setbacks though.
although we are moving to an apartment owned by the same company that owns our current house, we still need to pay a deposit on the new one. We don’t need to pay the entire deposit, but rather half. This is still a staggering €700.00 or $900.00.
This is a staggering amount for us, yet there is still more problems we are facing as well.
I have never understood this, maybe it is the fact that I am used to how life in the Army was, or in the United States is. But in Germany any apartment does not come with anything installed. No kitchen, and by this I mean the only thing in a kitchen here is the hookups for the water, and the oven. No counters, no shelves, and no cabinets. Nothing.
Same can be said about any of the rooms in the place. There are almost no built-in closets anywhere in Germany. There are no cabinets in the bathrooms.
We will be bringing the furniture we have with us in our apartment. However our kitchen is approximately 40 years old. So I will need to re-work it to fit into the new kitchen, and also replace the counter top portion of it. This is not too expensive, however when we weigh the costs we need to already lay down for the deposit, we are pushing €1,000.00 or around $1,300.00.
This to me is an outstanding number, just to move apartments, at the request of the company who wants to renovate their own building.
I find it amazing that they do not assist us, or offer us anything more than the cost of the truck we need to move, and they are basically only paying the cost for the deposit of it for the 2 days we will need. So again, look here. another cost added to the overall expenditures already building up.
I am not complaining. No. Rather I am excited to finally get out of the area where the teenage hooligans are slowly, unchecked by the police, taking over the area. In the past 2 years, they have constantly been spray painting the area with their horrible version of graffiti. Which is nothing more than spraying their “gang” logo, “Bergl 11” on every vertical surface they can find. I have even seen places where they have sprayed trees in the park behind our house. These Children hang out in an area in the park that is also a children’s play area. there are monkey bars, and a climbing ring there for them.
Every morning when I walk our dog through the park, I am only able to take him in a single direction, as there are smashed vodka and beer bottles on the ground. Trash litters every single inch of the grass, and the children’s play area where they occupy for the evening. I try to avoid it as much as possible, as there are constantly children meandering through the park in the mornings, on their way to the school located only a hundred feet away. It is an embarrassment that the children need to see this every morning on the way to the school, which by the way has also been spray painted with certain slogans popular with the “gang”. Ranging from “F**k the police”, “Bergl 11”, And various other colourful phrases.
I have seen the police often times called into the park to rouse a fight between them, or to see if there are any illegal drugs being used. But I never see them haul any of them away with them. This I find amazing.
They drink, smoke pot, and scream and yell all evening, by all evening I mean until at least 1 AM. I have often times even seen reminants of a bicycle they set on fire with lighter fluid the night before. There are also various other things they have burned, which I am surprised when they do, no one has called the fire department. They steal anything that is not locked up. There have been children’s tricycles from one of our neighbour children spotted in shambles in the park the next morning, when the 6 year old didn’t bring it back into the house when he went back inside. Scooters from his older brother often lie in pieces on the walkway in front of the apartments the next morning, as the “Gang” smashed it on the pavement as they walked by.(He has bought 3 to date)
When it rains, there is a tunnel through the apartment complex where we live, right below our bedroom window, and one of my son’s windows, and they then take up residence there for the course of the evening. They tear the plaster off of the wall, spray paint them, and light things on fire. Constantly yelling and screaming at each other. We have called the police no less than three times in the last year alone. There are over forty families living in this apartment building. So it makes me wonder how many other times they have been called to no avail?
With the state doing nothing about these children thinking they are so big, by the way, most of them are about 16-18 years old, There will be no change. No matter how many times my family calls the police, and other families call the police, there is no change. With no change will come the slow methodical transformation of the area from what at one point was a higher standard of living area. Now it is almost a ghetto. Sadly enough.
So the thought of moving excites me.
But I will need to work twice as hard to afford it, but I don’t mind, as it gets me away from “Bergl 11”.
Peace my friends.
When you watch the video I am posting below. there are two clues the makers of Tron Legacy were providing throughout the film, to show that Rinzler was infact Tron.
I however failed to see the second.
The first clue was the 4 boxes just below his neck line on his front.
a row of three, and directly below in the center a single.
such as this
This was almost always noticeable when Rinzler was on the screen, his visor did however sometimes cover them at times… However they did give the viewers another clue as to his identity.
In the following video, you will notice something I failed to notice the entire film, the first 4 times I watched it. When Rinzler activates his discs, you will notice that the outer ring, when they are not on, is the same shade of red as the rest of the disc, but when he activates it, it turns bright blue…
The makers left this in the film, as a clue that even though Tron was reprogramed and renamed Rinzler, somewhere within his identity Tron was still there.
The Discs in the Tron films, are called in actuality “Identity Discs”. upon these discs are the actual coding for the program it represents, and everything that it has encountered in its life.
It is my belief that the outer edge of the disc actually glows blue, as deep within Rinzler’s persona lied the program of Tron still. Understanding what was happening, and waiting for an exit from the Rinzler programming. So, when Rinzler activates his Identity disc, Tron is actually giving a sign that he is still there waiting, needing help.
But, This is my opinion, I do know they did leave the blue ring on his disc there on purpose. The reason, which I am sure I have figured out, Will and should be explained in the 3rd film…
I thank you for reading this…
Here are some of my recent, and I believe better posts I have made, but have not been linked to my home page…
Here is an article about why I believe I have become a Nerd again… Two Words, Tron Legacy
Here is an article close to me. It is about how Bartenders are the cheapest form of psychologist on the planet. and a couple stories I have personally experienced.
and finally, here is some research I have dug up about 2 new Tron projects. The first is some information about the rumored Tron 3, which according to a video I found has been greenlit, and also a new Tron television series being released in 2012
As always my friends.
Imagine if you would, if you still have not seen the Youtube video, with me:
The setting is a small street in China, and the security cameras spot a two year old child wandering in the street in front of his parents shop. Within short time, an approximately 7 ton delivery truck turns onto the narrow, seemingly seldom used street. Within seconds, the driver hits, and then runs over the child, stopping once the front left tire has completely rolled over his mid section.
The driver, seemingly in a daze, unsure what he has hit, then decides to flea the scene. The back tires of the truck then run over the child’s legs.
Within short time, pedestrians start passing the barely moving child on the street, looking at him, but passing by.
Again, another delivery truck enters the street, and again, runs over the child’s legs again. This time it was obvious that the driver recognized what was lying in the street, but opted to attempt to drive by the small helpless figure on the street.
Until finally a woman came, and propped the body on the side of the street, and contacted authorities, and the parents in their shop.
This event was captured on Closed Captioned Television (CCTV) in china recently. It came to our attention in my home, from my son, who watched the video, which was sent to him from a friend fuming about how the people reacted to what had happened.
The event lasted over 8 minutes on video, with more than 16 people walking by the child, who was lying almost in the middle of the street. Every one of them looking at the motionless figure on the ground. They continued on their lives, with the knowledge they did nothing. They were satisfied with that action.
First, have we as humans lost any empathy for others? Has the ability to act out for the benefit of others completely begun to elude us?
What about the parents? How does a two year old get out of the store, and wander on the street, even if it was in front of their shop?
I look at the mayhem that is plaguing the world at the moment, and wonder what the hell is happening. Sometimes I believe that the colonization of other planets is not coming soon enough. I for one would love the chance to just start over anew…
This is something that has been dwelling up in the human race for quite a while now. I first noticed it all the way back when the two teenagers entered the Columbine school in Colorado, and opened fire upon their own classmates and teachers.
As many of you may remember, back then the parents of the boys were up in arms about the fact that it was a video game that caused them to commit this atrocious act. They said that the game desensitized them to the point that human life no longer had a value. Counter Strike was the game in question.
If any of you are gamers, as I am, you may remember Counter Strike being nothing more than a team based terrorist hunt style game. Today we have one just like it called Rainbow Six Vegas 2. The goal of it is to hunt down terrorists in certain locations, gaining points for each kill, in order to advance in ranks.
I however in retrospect, do not believe video games are ever to blame for violence that is being perpetrated in the world at any given point. I have yet to see children jump on a turtle, because they saw Mario do it once. God forbid if one of the Halo gamers ever decided to “Stick” someone!!! I have not seen someone go absolutely insane yet with a shotgun, claiming that House of The Dead caused them to see zombies everywhere… You get my point.
What most failed to see in the columbine, and subsequent attacks around the globe, is that in all cases both parents worked, and the children were home alone until their return. Drugs, access to weapons, social shunning, and bad morale upbringing were primary causes for them. There is also one major point I want to hi-light, The fact both parents were confident in their upbringing of the children.
As a psychology student, I thought about this after it happened.
It was amazing to me how none of the parents took responsibility, but rather used the scapegoat of the video game culture to place the blame on. They did not believe, and most likely still do not believe that they were in any part responsible for the atrocities their children perpetrated. Never could it be the fact that the parents were not there allot of the time to help instil correct behavioural processes into their children. Proper teachings that children need to learn from their parents.
We as humans learn the beginning of our lives from our parents. We observe, absorb, and apply teachings from our parents into our lives. It is how, as a person becomes older, they suddenly have that “Man I am exactly like my(Mother/Father)” moment.
Now we stand on a new precipice, with a new style of non-human behavioural malfunction.
This child’s life could have been saved, right at the beginning.
The driver of the first truck, may have been distracted, trying to look for the address where the delivery was supposed to go, and not seen the child. But when he made the concious decision to resume driving, after looking what it was he hit, is where the failure on his part will forever haunt him. Justly is the case, I hope personally, that he torments in a personal hell that will last the rest of his life. I do not hate the man however. But I empathise for him.
Well we live in a society at the moment where we criticise people for late deliveries, more than taking the life of a small child. Walk by the lifeless form of a small child on the street because we are afraid of interfering in the matter, fearing becoming entangled in the bureaucratic red tape, and paperwork, and questioning involved with its discovery.
We have seemingly started a downward spiral in our empathising of others, worried more about the personal gains, rewards, punishments, and justifications of interfering with the fate of others.
We are also seemingly more and more absent in the rearing of our children, once they reach a certain age, and feel they can now fend for themselves. They are missing the parental taught morale upbringing needed to learn how to interact with peers, and humans alike.
We need to reach out to our neighbours and brethren living on the planet, no matter how many of us there are.
We need to stop wars, and come to peaceable conclusions to our indifferences.
Take the time out to help someone obviously in trouble.
I understand the perfect way of life imagined by Gene Rodenberry in Star Trek, where there is no longer any form of currency, in order to remove poverty, and to bring all to an equal status of living is impossible.
But with harmony, and love toward what we are, individually thinking self reliant creatures, capable of feeling, free thought, and emotion, maybe we can progress as a human race, and scientifically to develop technology to help us move out into the galaxy.
Then maybe I can get my wish… Starting over new in a colonization in space… on a planet Far, Far away…